Religion and Spirituality as Self Exploration with Life Coach Trinity Stukey
Reese Brown (00:45.704)
Trinity, thank you so much for joining me today. I am so excited to be seeing you and catching up with you and also to be having this conversation with you.
Trinity H Stukey (00:53.259)
Yay.
Trinity H Stukey (01:06.324)
Yeah, thank you so much for having me. I've been looking forward to this and I am so excited to catch up with you in chat.
Reese Brown (01:12.524)
me too. To kick off our conversation, first question I always ask to just set a good tone for the podcast is what is one thing you're grateful for right now?
Trinity H Stukey (01:25.438)
okay. One thing I'm grateful for right now is my village, the people that I have in my corner backing me, praying for me, crying with me, grounding me, and also shaking me out of myself. I can get really inside my head sometimes and I need, and I spiral. It's so funny, my best friend always refers to me by my horoscope sign.
when I'm in my mood. And so she's like, my little cancer crab, she's going back in her shell. And I do. I get in my shell and I claw out every now and then, but I hide. And so I'm grateful for the people who don't let me hide, who bring me out, who encourage me, who encourage me to seek God and pray when things get tough and pray for me and laugh with me and cheer for me when I can't cheer on myself. So one thing I'm grateful for right now is my village.
Reese Brown (02:20.202)
you
Reese Brown (02:23.7)
I love that. And I think to be not just not letting you hide, but also seeing when it's happening, right? Like being so in tune to who you are that they can be like, okay, I know what's happening, because I know you. And here's what we're going to do here, like to support you. That's really so beautiful. And also I think sometimes there is a, this tendency to want.
Trinity H Stukey (02:31.593)
Yeah.
Reese Brown (02:48.092)
I mean, people pleasing tendencies, right? I think we all struggle with it a little bit, but to want to please everyone. And when you find your village, you find your people, you can really play to them as your front row and not try and please everybody about it. So that's really so beautiful. Second question, it's a doozy, is what is your story? It is, big question, whatever you feel called to share in this moment is perfect.
Trinity H Stukey (02:51.278)
Yes.
See ya.
Trinity H Stukey (03:03.726)
Bye.
Reese Brown (03:17.94)
but I would love to know Trinity's story.
Trinity H Stukey (03:22.054)
let's start from the top, shall we? My story, I was raised in a very small family, even though I come from a big family, it was just me, my mom and my little brother, although I have lots of older siblings. It was just me, my younger brother and my mom. And she was a single mom and she did everything that she could to take care of us. We had very good.
years and then we also had some very rough and tough years. And being the not the oldest daughter, but the oldest daughter of a generation of kids. So my mom had a set of kids and then she waited like 15 years and decided to have another set of kids. So even though I'm more so the middle child, I've been an older sister, an older daughter my whole life.
Reese Brown (04:18.954)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (04:20.07)
And that's always made me be more of like an extra parent, an extra adult. And I didn't mind as a kid, you know, helping my mom, because a lot of stories you hear, people resent their parents when they're single parents and taking care of things the best that they can. I really always admired my mom for taking care of us the best she could, doing the best she could with what she had.
And I always wanted to help. I always wanted to do my part. I always wanted to lend a hand. And so I have and I always have. So, but that also puts a lot of responsibility on your back and it creates certain personal dynamics. So like I have a fear of heights. I have a fear of the dart, you know, regular kid stuff. And then I also have a huge fear of failure.
Cause I always felt like if I made the good grades, if I never got in trouble, if I always did the right thing, that was always a weight off of my mom's shoulders. It was something she didn't have to worry about, which in hindsight, I don't regret. It's made me the person I am today. And I'm proud of my character. I'm proud of my reputation. I'm proud of my morals and my values, but I've always had this underlying sense of if I fail, the world is going to come up underneath me. I have to always build my A game. always have to be doing what's right.
and pivot to the most important, I guess, shift in my life. Everything has always gone well for me. I hate to say that, and it's not arrogant, but everything has always gone so well for me until it did it and I didn't know what to do. So I had quit my job to pursue a law degree because I've always wanted to be a lawyer. I've always wanted to help people. I've always had this underlying sense.
of justice needing to be served. Like being a little kid, my favorite movies were The Hunchback of Notre Dame and Pocahontas. What do those two things have in common? Justice, standing up for other people, even if that means going against your family, even if that means going against your culture, if you do what's right and you help people and you're there, and you defend the little man. So I've always kind of adopted those character traits as part of who I am. Well, I went to pursue my law degree and I studied
Reese Brown (06:18.112)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (06:45.332)
And I took the test and I invested hundreds and hundreds of dollars and it didn't work out and I ended up failing twice. And so then it was like, okay, now I have no job. I've invested hundreds of dollars and now I've got to try to find something. And so I found a job, stayed with that, found another one that I felt could be more my niche. That didn't work out. Then I got saddled with another job that may not have been what I was looking for at the time, but ended up being a huge blessing. But you see this pattern of
Reese Brown (07:13.61)
you
Trinity H Stukey (07:15.06)
I went for something, it didn't pan out the way I wanted it to. And then I just felt like I kept tumbling further and further and further down a hole. Whereas before everything had always went right for me. And then I got faced with nothing is going the way I planned. Nothing is going the way it should. That should the way I expect it to go or the way it's gone. And so I had this very inherent feeling of I'm failing. This is a failure.
Reese Brown (07:35.057)
you
Trinity H Stukey (07:43.616)
I got my bachelor's degree. did dual enrollment classes. I finished college early. I don't party. I stay home. I don't hang out. And when I do, I do proper character trait, right girl things. And what was it all for? If I'm not living the life that I I was going to. And then what does that mean for me? So then fast forward, I'm not happy.
Reese Brown (07:44.874)
Thank
Trinity H Stukey (08:13.174)
I get married. My husband is absolutely amazing. We buy a house together. We're living this fantastic life and I feel like.
I'm doing well emotionally, and relationally. Like, I'm happy with my husband. I'm happy with my home. I'm happy with my friends. I'm happy with my family. But something about Trinity was missing. And I would cry and pray almost every day for three years, God, you've got to change something. You've got to change something. I'm not happy. I don't know what it is. And it's not, I'm not happy with what I have. I'm not happy with.
Reese Brown (08:37.178)
Hmm.
Reese Brown (08:43.396)
Wow.
Trinity H Stukey (08:52.682)
something inside of me is missing, something inside of me is wrong. Then I started my business because God gave me the nudge and said, why don't you do what you've always known how to do, which is be a social media agent. You know how to manage social media. You know how to grow community bases. You're a community based person and you're so creative, you're so talented. Use those gifts. That then transforms into
Reese Brown (09:15.03)
you
Trinity H Stukey (09:20.98)
maybe going into pursuing life coaching. And I put that off for a full year. And then all of a sudden I just kept feeling the Holy Spirit just tell me like, you got to do this, you got to do this, you got to do this. And one day I actually got absolutely knocked upside the head because I was like, well, I'm gonna do it, but who's going to pay for it? And I heard it clear as day. If I have been financially supporting you so far, what makes you think I'm not going to financially support you in what I'm asking you to do?
Reese Brown (09:29.877)
Thank
Reese Brown (09:40.758)
And I reported to you, and I have said my name before, what makes you think I'm not going do my mission?
Trinity H Stukey (09:51.33)
So I was like, okay, nevermind, I'll find out. You don't have to tell me, Kathy, you don't have tell me again. And I signed up for the Certified Life Coach Institute and it absolutely changed my life. And I did both courses because I'm an all or nothing girl. In class we learned, some people are black and white. Yeah, I'm pretty much black and white. Like I'm either gonna do it all or I'm not gonna do it at all. I am not a halfway girl at all.
Reese Brown (10:00.982)
you
Reese Brown (10:08.357)
you
Trinity H Stukey (10:19.968)
It's the not wanting to fail perfectionist in me. And our advisor for the certified life coach Institute says something in class when we first started and he said, in order to be a good coach, you've got to be a good client. So bring forth real problems to the table and watch how people attack those real problems and help guide you through your real problems.
Reese Brown (10:20.619)
Trinity H Stukey (10:46.926)
And that will help you on the back end when you have to be the coach. So I brought real problems to the table throughout the whole class and throughout the whole two courses we had to take. All 70 hours. And when I tell you I had such an emotional breakthrough because of this class and I found out that.
Because of my failure, I was in a three year grieving period because I could not come to terms with the fact that I had failed. And in failing, I wasn't properly grieving that failure and I was letting it drag me down. And I also got the revelation as well that I had left myself behind
Reese Brown (11:18.046)
Hmm.
Trinity H Stukey (11:39.692)
because when I failed and I wasn't good enough anymore in my eyes and I didn't accomplish something the way I thought I should in my eyes, I was like, no, I'm gonna keep moving on. But I never went back for me. I never went back and said, it's okay, people make mistakes. It's fine, the world is not ending. I just kept beating up on myself for three years consistently because of one mistake I made. And not really a mistake, it was just I tried something and it didn't work out.
Reese Brown (11:54.582)
you
Reese Brown (12:08.107)
Right.
Trinity H Stukey (12:08.354)
The one time it didn't work out, I didn't have my own back. And that was a hard thing to come to terms with is that when you don't pan out the way you think you should, you beat yourself up, you leave yourself behind and you make yourself suffer. Nobody else is doing that to you. You're doing that to yourself. So that was a hard thing to cope with. But in finding that out, I've been putting forth better efforts to
Feed myself fact, not opinion. And so a lot of times we are our own worst enemy and we feed ourselves these false things like, it's not gonna work out. you're not gonna be able to do that. Nobody's gonna take that advice from you. Who do you think you are? You're not even qualified. All of those are opinions. What are the facts? The facts are, I am the head, I am not the tail. The fact is, I am called for this. The fact is, God doesn't
Reese Brown (12:39.891)
you
Trinity H Stukey (13:07.576)
put us in situations that we haven't already been preordained for or prepared for. Anything that we're called to do, we were called to do it the day we were born. Those are the facts. And so because I've tried to grow that seed within myself to feed myself fact and not opinion, that's been able to help me not leave myself behind, cut myself some slack, give myself the grace and compassion that I give to other people and that God gives to me so that I can be the best version of me.
for everybody else. And that's my story and I'm sticking to it.
Reese Brown (13:43.36)
Though I, one, thank you for sharing. It truly, just love hearing about people, but it's so interesting how many things like kind of fold in on each other and come back and round back to this really beautiful message of taking care of yourself, self -love, putting self first in order to take care of others. And even what you shared from a very young age of
Trinity H Stukey (13:56.707)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (14:03.821)
Yes.
Reese Brown (14:13.194)
being a caretaker very much.
Trinity H Stukey (14:14.966)
Mm -hmm.
Reese Brown (14:18.35)
so difficult to learn how to internalize the message that says when I take care of myself, I am taking care of other people because it feels counterintuitive. It doesn't feel like it makes sense. But like you said, it not making sense as an opinion. The fact is that is what helps me better take care of other people and better show up as my best self is when I am taking care of myself. A really common theme throughout this too is
Trinity H Stukey (14:36.459)
Yep.
Reese Brown (14:48.66)
Like from the very beginning, you said you always kind of had this fear of failure. And I really relate to your, said everything really worked out for me until it didn't. And I think being this very like type A go -getter, like I don't want to put words in your mouth, but for me, like goody two shoes, like all of that kind of stuff. Like I'm going to do everything by the book because that's...
Trinity H Stukey (14:59.852)
Yep.
Reese Brown (15:15.424)
how I hit the marks, do the things, be successful, right? Be happy, be perfect and good and worthy and worthwhile.
and there's this fear of failure, and then the perceived failure happens, right? But exactly like you said, it's not even a failure. It's trying something and learning from it. How do you define failure now?
Trinity H Stukey (15:42.77)
I define failure now by effort. I've been looking at the certain things that I've been doing in my life. So I just rebranded my business and I just added life coaching to that business. And it's so funny because I got my photos back, they were fabulous. And I got all this batch content ready to like put out to like promote my business and promote my life coaching and promote me.
Reese Brown (15:45.641)
Hmm.
Trinity H Stukey (16:11.03)
And I did that in a week. And then the next week, so this week, I was supposed to put that information out there. And I, again, my little craft self got in my shell and I was like, I'm not doing it. I'm scared. I've got the nerves. I think people are going to make fun of me. I don't think anyone's going to take me seriously. I don't know if I'm fully prepared for this. I don't like public scrutiny. I'm a go -getter, but I'm scared of people.
And I just had to do it. And like my husband had to sit down and give me like a speak life into you push and speech to like get me, you know, to see like, Hey, like, it's okay. Like this is your business. You still got to put it out there. You've worked so hard. People deserve to see it. You deserve to give yourself a chance. And so I put everything out there and I posted all my stuff and I sat down with myself and I said, okay, if I don't get
one line, if nobody calls me, if nobody cares, that does not matter. It's not the end of the world. It's the end of the world when you've done all this work and then you're too caught up in your own opinions and not the facts that you don't put yourself out there. That's the true failure. The true failure is you doing all this work, having all this confidence to get all these things done and then not letting anyone see what you've done, not even giving anybody a chance to reject you.
Reese Brown (17:35.36)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (17:38.188)
You haven't even given anyone a chance. You haven't given anybody to see and say, hey, I do think I could benefit from that. I would love your input. That's the true failure. The true failure is doing all this work that has been given to you in a call by God. So you say, and this is me to me. So you say, but then hiding that from people, because that's not what God gives us gifts and grace and favor for. He gives us that so that we can give it back out to the world.
There's a reason we have that go -getter spontaneous, charismatic charm. It's to spread goodness to everybody else. And the true failure is not even trying, not even putting in that effort after you've done all this face work. So I define failure now by effort. My failure is I put the effort in. Whatever happens, happens.
Reese Brown (18:17.227)
Yeah.
Reese Brown (18:22.664)
No, I, yeah.
Absolutely, the failure can only come in to the pieces that we can control, right? In that I'm the one holding myself back. I'm the one putting up the walls. I'm the one keeping myself from the fullest highest expression of who I am called to be, of who I know I am meant to be. And everything else is just response and learning and you have to go with it.
also really love in this kind of conversation that you had with your husband where he said, you deserve to put this out there, but also other people deserve to see it too. And I just believe in that so strongly that the things that we are given, the gifts we are given, the purpose that we are called to is our duty.
It is our obligation to go after it. And not only is that the only way that you can step into your fullest presence of self, but that's the greatest gift you can give to the world. And the world deserves that, right? that, they, other people, the world, spirit, energy, the universe deserves you at your best. And so I just, I so appreciate that.
Trinity H Stukey (19:22.542)
Bye for now.
Trinity H Stukey (19:36.896)
Absolutely.
Trinity H Stukey (19:45.633)
Absolutely.
Reese Brown (19:49.28)
When do you think that shift in how you thought about failure came and how did that happen? And I know you mentioned this kind of three year period of like rough contemplation and really questioning a lot, but also wanting that next step in peace. What was that like? And how have you come out of that on the back end?
renewed and rejuvenated in your passion and purpose and with this newfound mindset in relationship to failure.
Trinity H Stukey (20:27.064)
So just so I heard you correctly, how did I get to the point of failure? Like how did I get there?
Reese Brown (20:33.558)
How did you get to where you are now today? now that you're kind of through this, the difficult moment and of course I don't think there's like an ending to this journey, right? But.
Trinity H Stukey (20:36.023)
Reese Brown (20:51.136)
having had failure be something that you were struggling with and grieving, right? How did you grieve it and were you able to be where you are now?
Trinity H Stukey (21:02.798)
okay, this is very special to me. So on the last day of my life coaching class, I can't say enough about it. It changed my life. And I really feel like God had me go through this, not just to become a life coach, but God loves me, even when I don't love myself. And so I'm sure after three years, he was kinda like, all right, I'm tired of this. You need to get yourself together.
So I'm going to send you to a class and you're going to get this off your chest so that you can get back to business because you're kind of spiral this is. So on the last day of my coaching class, I was with, you know, one of our colleagues and she was coaching me and we were doing an exercise and I was basically telling her that I confidence in myself and in my decisions because I don't trust my gut or my gut intuition.
Reese Brown (21:39.167)
Mmm.
Trinity H Stukey (22:03.094)
And that comes from that one incident with deciding to go to law school and thinking, yeah, this is it. If I make this step, I'm going to succeed. And then I'll be able to go forward. And then I did not. And then it's like, I can't trust the decisions I make because apparently now I won't make the decisions. So I had no trust. I had no trust in my gut. I had no trust in my intuition. I'm very stagnant because I can't make concrete choices because of that. So.
Reese Brown (22:18.495)
Mmm. Right.
Trinity H Stukey (22:32.184)
She did this very, very beautiful exercise with me. And God bless her. She did this beautiful exercise with me. And she just said, I want you to close your eyes. And she took her three deep breaths. And she said, I want you to think of your happy place. She said, I want you to touch something and find something tangible and move it. So I just grabbed my shirt and started touching it. And I just thought of a happy place to kind of just measure myself.
And then she asked me to imagine myself walking into a door and seeing myself at the end of my life. Tears, already crying. And then she asked me, what did I look like? How did I look? Was I happy? What were my features like? Like, how do you see yourself at the end of your life? And I didn't look enough. I looked at peace. I looked happy. I looked fulfilled.
And she basically just said, OK, now what do you hear yourself at the end of your life saying to you in the situation you're in now? And I'll tell you that took some accountability. Because I started hearing things like, the money doesn't matter, enjoy the ride. You are loved. You are not a failure. You are called according to his purpose. Believe in yourself. You can do this.
Reese Brown (23:38.611)
Hmm.
Trinity H Stukey (23:53.416)
Enjoy your life and enjoy what is here. Enjoy the present. Everything else is going to work out. You've got to let it go. Get peace. And a lot of these things were even hard for me to say because as silly as it sounds, I'm imagining me at the end of my life. So I'm not looking at myself physically, but this idea that I can imagine myself at the end of my life. Being so happy in that piece and OK telling me now. You're calling.
Reese Brown (23:54.912)
you
Trinity H Stukey (24:23.116)
It's okay. Get your piece. Don't worry about the money and the tangible things of the world. Enjoy the ride. Everything works out. It's like almost why couldn't I have told myself that before? Why couldn't I have said that to myself? And so hearing all that and almost feeling that weight almost lifted off my shoulders when I came out of it and she had me open my eyes and I just sat there and I was crying and she was like, okay, like
Reese Brown (24:23.498)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (24:53.112)
How do you feel? What was that like for you? And I like, I feel like I just had this elephant lifted off my shoulders and lifted off my chest. So I feel like this renewed sense of peace, this renewed sense of faith, this renewed sense of everything's going to be OK. It's all going to work out. And that was where that shift happened for me. I walked out of that class.
Reese Brown (25:15.936)
Mm.
Trinity H Stukey (25:22.06)
and I walked out of those courses as a master's certified professional life coach, but also as a point of eternity. I personally can say I haven't been the same since then. I feel like I have had more confidence. I have had more depth in my step. I have put more effort into myself. And I even had this conversation with my husband. was like, I feel so different, but I'm also so sad. And he was like, why are you sad? I said, because I look back.
at those three years and I feel so, I feel sorry that it took me three years to figure out what I knew now. Cause all I could think is look at all that time, then look at all that hurt that I put myself through over something that now seems so silly. But it wasn't silly, it was important. And I didn't understand the true importance of it. I would, and because I didn't understand the true importance of it, I wasn't letting myself.
Reese Brown (25:56.576)
Hmm.
Trinity H Stukey (26:20.76)
process it well, I was bit self -reflecting on it well, but now I can and now I have, and so I can move past that as a better, more whole person.
Reese Brown (26:28.715)
Yeah.
Yeah, no, that's so beautiful. also, like you said, it ties into the idea of not leaving yourself behind, right? That I think a big reason why these things stick with us is because we want to be able to just say, okay, it's in the past, I'm moving on, I don't want to think about it anymore. And it's like if a child falls down and scrapes their knee, you don't pick them up and say, okay.
Trinity H Stukey (26:49.877)
it
Reese Brown (27:00.746)
done, we're not gonna acknowledge it. You're like, no, okay, let's make sure you're okay. Let's put a bandaid on it. And now we can go out and run and play, but we'll keep changing the bandaid. We'll make sure you get the healing and help you need so that the skin grows back strong and doesn't get infected or whatever, right? And it feels very much like that, where it's the self -grace of time and processing and...
Trinity H Stukey (27:05.933)
you
Reese Brown (27:29.3)
like wrapping yourself up in a big hug instead of punishing yourself, right? And even hearing you say like, that you were stuck in this kind of spiral, that you didn't trust your gut anymore because of this one quote unquote bad decision that I now have to punish myself because I cannot trust myself as an ally anymore. It's...
healing that broken trust the same way that it would be with another person, right? And I mean, at least to me, sounds like turning away from yourself in that moment is almost just as much of a betrayal as the feeling of making a, again, quote, unquote bad decision is, but what a beautiful act of.
Trinity H Stukey (28:14.871)
lovely
Reese Brown (28:19.142)
self -love and acceptance to fast forward to you at the end of your life. And I love that you said it takes accountability to hear you can do it. You are worthy. You are loved. You are loving. Follow your passion because those sometimes are the hardest things to hear and not just hear, but really work to believe.
Trinity H Stukey (28:31.426)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (28:47.447)
Right.
Reese Brown (28:48.946)
Yeah, that's such a beautiful story. And I do think that that for our listeners, if you haven't done an exercise like that before, maybe do like a little self guided meditation and try to do it for yourself because I mean, clearly did wonders for you. And I think even if it's not that groundbreaking for someone else, it'll still be.
Trinity H Stukey (29:10.859)
It is.
Reese Brown (29:20.084)
reflective and insightful. So thank you for sharing that and being so vulnerable and sharing that as well, because it's hard to go there and acknowledge these pieces of things.
I also want to go back to this kind of oldest daughter archetype, I suppose. Because of course there's all of the different psychology around like birth order and what does it mean to be the oldest or the youngest and of course different genders, like it looks different and within generations and but for all intents and purposes you were the oldest daughter and I do think that
in hearing you tell your story, was something that, it's like, I don't hold resentment because I understand. I understand, like, the reality of the situation and I think it's beautiful that you're kind of holding the...
Trinity H Stukey (30:09.504)
Yeah.
Reese Brown (30:20.564)
difficulty of what certain things give you with also the, but my mom's doing her best in a great job a lot of the time, you know? And both of these things can be true. Talk to me a bit more about that and how you think you developed that paradigm.
Trinity H Stukey (30:29.443)
Mm
Trinity H Stukey (30:39.822)
So, and it's funny because I don't think I was ever given the option to not be realistic. I think any childish playfulness I've ever had, I've kind of had to create a world of my own with, because my life has always been very realistic. You know, like my parents started off married and then they weren't.
Reese Brown (30:51.849)
Hmm.
Trinity H Stukey (31:09.472)
And then, you know, I've lived with my mom. I lived with my dad for a short period of time, but primarily it's been me, my mom and my brother. And in every instance of my life, I've always been the, I've always had to be the strong one, not just always been, I've always had to be the strong one. I've always had to be accountable. I've always had to look out. I always had to be realistic. Like I will say this about, you know, my mom and I will say this about my dad.
Because I'm not one of those kids who does not know who her dad is. I know who my dad is. I met him. We don't have the best relationship, but I pray for him. God bless him wherever he is. But that's just, it does not work in my puzzle. I'm grown. I know what I can handle and that's just not it. But God bless him and love him. But I don't think, I think with both of my parents, they've always been very realistic with me. Nobody has ever sugar coated anything from me.
And so I've always understood what it meant to be a single parent. I've always understood what it meant to struggle. I've always understood what it meant to, you know, do everything that you need to do on a kid's side. And then here is how you can help contribute at the house. Now I'll never say that like I had, I had to work like five jobs at the age of 13. But when I was 16, I got a job and
I was so proud of that because I knew if I get this job, I can pay for all my stuff and then my mom only has to afford one kid. That was my mindset for that. And then growing up, I just had always worked and I've always had a job because financial stability was important to me because I know what it's like to not be financially stable. And I'll say this, we weren't like holes in socks kids. My mom went without for a lot of my life to make sure that my brother and I looked
and felt like other kids did. We had home cooked meals every day. We never missed a meal. We participated in all the church events. We had brand new school clothes every year. We had brand new shoes every year. Every Christmas we had whatever we wanted, even if it meant she had nothing and she went without and she had to sacrifice. We did not grow up being having to feel like we were without. It was the reality of knowing we have because she's going without and because she can't have.
Reese Brown (33:34.859)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (33:37.942)
And because she can't afford to have extra for herself, so everything we get is to us. That was the reality. So I've always had to be realistic about my situation. But I still keep a very playful childlike -ness. So because of that realization, I've always been overly very responsible.
Reese Brown (33:44.03)
Yeah. Well, yeah, yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (34:06.764)
And you mentioned earlier the goody two shoes. That is such a sore subject for me because I don't feel I was a goody two shoes. I was a little bit of a rebel back in the day.
Reese Brown (34:16.702)
Okay, tell me more. Tell me more. No, I love that because I do think that there is such an interesting, and it will come back to some of the other things you just mentioned too, but I really do want to dive into this because there's such an interesting dichotomy between, you mentioned you're a cancer earlier. I'm a Virgo and the Virgos are like by the book and all of these things, but there's also kind of a...
Trinity H Stukey (34:21.883)
Trinity H Stukey (34:40.213)
Yeah.
Reese Brown (34:43.55)
an edge to Virgos where it's like I always say I'm the justice -oriented rebel because it's like I will follow rules till the cows come home if I agree with the rule and and we need to interrogate the rule right but
Trinity H Stukey (34:45.047)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (34:53.639)
Come on! That's it!
Trinity H Stukey (35:03.347)
Exactly!
Reese Brown (35:07.636)
I love a rule. So all that to say, that is certainly something that I have come to kind of like Goody Two Shoes as a title to try and kind of reclaim and rework. Talk to me about that. I love it.
Trinity H Stukey (35:20.83)
Yes, I fully agree with what you said. like growing up, I was a straight A student. I was an honor student. All the teachers loved me, even though I talked a lot and I always seemed to hang out with the kids that they didn't like. And I mean, I couldn't help it. mean, my friends were my friends, but I would always get that lecture about Trudy.
Reese Brown (35:39.963)
you
Trinity H Stukey (35:48.738)
careful who you sit by, Trinity, be careful what you do. Trinity, watch who you're around. And in my mind, like, they're not doing anything. They're just not like me. And I've always had that reality that because of how well put together and how educated and well -spoken I was, I always presented an otherness. You are better than that. You shouldn't be a part of that. Don't be around them. And that's not always a bad thing.
Reese Brown (35:59.817)
Yeah.
Reese Brown (36:10.422)
Hmm.
Trinity H Stukey (36:18.914)
But sometimes it is a misconception of who that person really is. Because I will say this, I have never been one to be friends or be around people who I didn't feel were inherently good people. Or, and maybe their situations were just different. I can't help that I'm different. I can't help the way I talk. I can't help the way I was raised. Because that's another thing. My mom started me and my brother at all in private schools. Like we, I was taught cursive at.
Reese Brown (36:22.58)
Yeah.
Reese Brown (36:31.626)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (36:47.65)
Four or five years old, I knew everything. Like we grew up with good education. We grew up knowing how to speak well. My mom was very, very adamant about that. You are going to grow out in the world. You're going to be the best that you can be. So help me God. And that's always been her passion. So my brother and I grew up going to private schools. We talk very proper. We sound very educated. We are very educated. And my mom made that a point of being.
Reese Brown (37:03.314)
Yeah, yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (37:15.822)
So that had always created an otherness for me culturally and societally that has separated me from other people. And because of that, I have always looked like a bit of a goody two shoes. And I'm not, I just follow the rules because why not? The rules are there, they're not that bad. But I like what you said. I'm a rule follower when I feel like the rule makes sense.
Reese Brown (37:22.582)
you
Trinity H Stukey (37:43.938)
Because I also grew up with a mom who said just because they're your elder does not mean they can speak to you any kind of way. And what does she tell me that for? Because I took that very seriously. And I'll say this. I have always been the outspoken one of the group. And I'll never forget there was an incident when I was in high school and
Reese Brown (37:53.462)
That's right.
Trinity H Stukey (38:12.992)
All the other senior classes before my senior class got the opportunity to leave school half a day to go to work because, you know, I ran with the smart kids crowd. We all took dual enrollment. We were all done with our high school credits. So we really only came to school for one elective, a couple college courses, and then we were done for the remainder of the day. And most of us worked. I worked. I worked. I was...
Reese Brown (38:36.074)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (38:40.216)
Hey, I clothes to buy, I shopping to do. I need to go to work. So I remember they were, the administration at the time and the vice principal and principal were saying that they weren't gonna let our class do that because they felt that we should stay at school because it promoted school spirit to the underclassmen. Well, that didn't work for me. So me and all of my smart friends, all got together or I will say,
Reese Brown (38:42.272)
Great.
Trinity H Stukey (39:10.254)
Honor roll student kids dual enrollment friends. We all got together. We were talking about it and everybody looks at me and go. So what are you going to do about that? And I was like, well, I guess we're going to have a meeting. So I scheduled a meeting with admin. There were five or six of me because we so I had like a little squad. We saw ourselves squad back in the day and we were all the honor students dual enrollment. We were better than everybody else.
kids. Not really. We were friends with everybody, but we we hung out primarily together. We were our own thing, our own world for a long time and us and a couple other kids got together. And the principal and vice principal are sitting there and they're giving us that spiel about we need to promote school spirit. You guys need to be here. This is your senior year and this would look really good for our school. You guys should not be leaving half a day.
And I basically was just like, well, when your daughter wanted to do it that one year and she was also a dual enrollment kid and she was also an honor roll, you let her leave half a day to go to work. What's the difference between me and her? And she was just like, well, it's a very good point. And so it was literally me backing the kids versus the admin. And needless to say, at about one o 'clock, we were getting out of there every day for senior year.
Reese Brown (40:33.002)
Love it.
Reese Brown (40:36.864)
That's right. Well, and so often there are so many roles that are in place just because no one's questioning them, right? It's like they are usually introduced at a time where it's like, okay, this made sense at a certain point, but times change, culture changes, society changes, and our frameworks and paradigms need to evolve with humanity and human beings. And...
Trinity H Stukey (40:43.598)
Mm -hmm. Yep, Jessica's nose quenching it.
Reese Brown (41:06.492)
truly it to be like, well, we're going to make y 'all the scapegoats for us to have school spirit. It's like, maybe do your job better as admin in increasing school spirit as opposed to forcing y 'all to stay. And do you think having a bunch of seniors being told that they cannot be treated the same way as every single other senior class has?
Trinity H Stukey (41:12.394)
Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep.
Reese Brown (41:32.022)
You think those are the students with really great school spirit that you want to be there? It's also not gonna have the effect you want it to. But I love that because speaking truth to power always has been and always will be so necessary, but also takes so much like chutzpah, like guts to be the one, especially in like the power dynamic of that, right? It's like you're 17, 18 when you're a senior.
Trinity H Stukey (41:34.549)
Exactly!
Trinity H Stukey (41:52.512)
Yeah.
Reese Brown (42:01.524)
You are a child talking to adults, calling them on their bullshit. And that is not easy to do, but it so speaks to your character and passion for justice. It really, really does. And it reminds me, I just so relate to that too, because it's like, I can be a goody goody, but that doesn't mean that it's like,
Trinity H Stukey (42:01.548)
Yeah. Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (42:08.984)
Hahahaha
It's not.
Trinity H Stukey (42:21.272)
Yeah.
Reese Brown (42:30.422)
It's rooted in something really real actually. And I remember like freshman year of high school, we had a syllabus for one of my math classes that said we were only gonna have like 20 homework questions a night. And I was like, okay, sounds good to me. One day a few weeks later, we get our homework assignment. There's 40 questions on it. Like, okay.
Trinity H Stukey (42:55.758)
40!
Reese Brown (42:55.894)
Here we go, I'm rolling up my sleeves. And I'm like, I don't mind having 40 questions for homework, but don't tell me one thing. Exactly, make me take it home, get my mom to sign it. I have to sign it, you have to sign it. Like it's a legally binding contract. And then you break it? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And so I...
Trinity H Stukey (43:06.52)
But be honest.
Trinity H Stukey (43:16.383)
Mm hmm. Yeah. Yeah.
Reese Brown (43:22.582)
The teacher stepped out of the class and everyone's like, if you believe it, we have 40 homework questions. And I'm like, yeah, I'm to ask him about it when he gets back because that's doesn't make sense. And he was like, well, don't I give you time in class every single day to work on homework? So that's really up to you how many homework questions you have and if you can get them done. I'm like, so we have five minutes left. Is the expectation that we get 20 questions done in five minutes because that's
Trinity H Stukey (43:44.972)
Hahaha
Trinity H Stukey (43:50.762)
Right. And what kind of questions are these?
Reese Brown (43:53.874)
Right, right. And how is that conducive to learning if that's the expectation? So turned into this whole thing, but I just so relate to that. But also I think it's so beautiful that your peers look to you to be the leader and the champion of that. Like what a sign of respect, but also trust and admiration that that vote of confidence really does give and I think speaks to
you're calling and your ability to form community and connection is because people trust you to fight for them. And that is such a gift. It really, really is across everything. I also want to go back to before we got into the goody two shoes thing, talking a little bit about like the expectation to write of, but
Trinity H Stukey (44:22.946)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (44:29.728)
Yeah. Thank you.
Trinity H Stukey (44:41.386)
You
Reese Brown (44:48.34)
You know, you are the company you keep, make sure you hang out with the good kids, not the bad kids. And I think a lot of that goes into this idea of tracking, which I've been learning a lot about that a lot of schools do purposefully and all do whether knowingly or unknowingly, where it's like from a very young age, labels are put on kids of what kind of student they're going to be, what kind of.
Trinity H Stukey (44:53.656)
Mm
Reese Brown (45:15.466)
adult they're going to be and school is very much, I love what you said earlier when you're like, not my smart friends, my honor roll friends, right? It's like, school's not a measure of intelligence, it's a measure of how good you are at school. Which teaches you a lot, right? But the fact that in like a common theme through all of these stories is adults putting expectations onto kids that are forcing
Trinity H Stukey (45:22.654)
Yeah.
No, it's not.
Reese Brown (45:45.374)
this narrative that there is such thing as a bad kid, right? It's like you're a child and that you are felt othered by having these higher expectations and that more is expected of you, which is also just as damaging in a school setting to do to a kid, right? And I absolutely relate to the fear of failure thing. I don't know if there's a question in there somewhere, but I have a lot of thoughts and I would love to know if you have any thoughts about all of that kind of stuff.
Trinity H Stukey (45:49.346)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (46:14.59)
It's the hunger games. It's the institutionalized hunger games.
It really is. And I'll say this, I loved school. I did. I was one of those kids who when the summer was over, I was like, yeah, that sucks. But I get to go see my friends every day. I'm going to learn stuff. And I'll say I was also a champion for my education. I was. You were not going to hold me back. I remember one year we had a Spanish teacher and
Reese Brown (46:25.93)
Yeah, I did too.
Reese Brown (46:32.831)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (46:47.694)
He hadn't been my Spanish teacher. I had had another Spanish teacher, but she did so well. She made me love Spanish songs. I can't wait for Spanish too. Well, when I started inquiring about the other Spanish teacher, I started hearing things that not bad things about him. Very nice man did very well. Students loved him, but his style of teaching was not appropriate for me. And look at me, 16 or 17 years old, 16. That's not appropriate for me.
Reese Brown (47:11.926)
That's right.
Trinity H Stukey (47:17.454)
You're not going to teach the way I want you to teach me. So I went to my mom after taking Spanish 1 and I was like, hey, I don't know if I want to be in his class. I don't know if that's going to give me what I need because I actually like learning Spanish and I want to continue to like it. And I want to continue on the trajectory that I set for myself. Can I take Spanish 2 online?
Reese Brown (47:39.456)
Mmm.
Trinity H Stukey (47:44.494)
And so she got me signed up with Florida Virtual School and I took Spanish too all summer before we went back to school for my, I want to say my junior year. Yeah, so was before junior year and I had spent the whole summer taking Spanish too. And it was great. Yeah, I was like, cool for them. I don't think that's going to work for me. I'll do my own thing.
Reese Brown (48:01.302)
You're like, peace, I don't need you. Yeah.
Reese Brown (48:10.102)
And I do love that because even being 16, 17, I think so often kids narratives are undermined that it's like, well, what do you know for either lack of education, lack of experience or projected naivety, right? It's like even kids are the number one expert in themselves. And
Not all kids, and not to say that it won't change and morph and grow, but listen when someone tells you something, right? And it's if I am someone who likes to be engaged in the classroom in a certain way, or I know that I work really well in this environment, and that is not this, who's to say a 16 year old can't know that about themselves and good on you for advocating for what you needed? Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (48:58.03)
Yeah, 100%. Yeah.
Reese Brown (49:04.424)
Another thing I want to make sure we have plenty of time to chat about, because it's so clearly such an integral part of your character and who you are, is your faith. I think it's a really important part of making meaning and purpose. And I suppose I'll just open the floor a little bit to how your faith developed. Was it in the home when you were growing up? Was it discovered later on? Did you ever have a...
Reese Brown (49:34.754)
moving away and then returning to how has it developed and what does faith mean to Trinity now?
Trinity H Stukey (49:42.182)
this is my favorite story. Okay, once upon a time. So fun fact, I'm a PK. So my parents were pastors and had their own church. So I was brought up in the church from the womb. I'm actually named after the Trinity. Fun story, my parents were fighting over my name when I was born because my mom wanted me be named one thing.
My dad wanted to add a name. My mom thought it was ugly. And so they were just sitting there like, well, I guess we're not budging. And then my mom said, my dad wants outside, came back inside. was like, God said name her Trinity. And so my name's Trinity. And so I am literally named Trinity like the Bible. And it's funny because when people ask me, how do you spell your name? Trinity like the Bible? That version. So I've been brought up in the Christian faith.
Reese Brown (50:30.422)
Mm -hmm. That one.
Trinity H Stukey (50:37.91)
my whole life. It is an integral part of who I am. My mom pushed that for me and my brother. I've grown up in the church. I've done just about everything that you can do in a church. I was very active in my high school FCA. It's been everything to me. And then, this is such a good story. Okay. So then I've always had a good faith, but I got to the point that as I got older, I didn't feel like
I was being fed And I don't even think at that time I knew what that was. I just knew that.
Reese Brown (51:12.661)
Mmm.
Trinity H Stukey (51:15.79)
So growing up in the church, and I've grown up around a lot of denominations, Pentecostal, Episcopal, Baptist, I have seen it all, I have been there with it all, I love it all. But I remember my mom always saying, there are no two for one tickets in the heaven, you have to get your own. My mom always used to say that, it's one of my top 10 favorite quotes.
because my mom has had some banger quotes throughout my entire life that I've lived off of. There are no two for one tickets in the heaven, it's top 10, it's top. And then my mom would always say, you should not walk into church and walk out the exact way you went in. As I got older, I started to understand what that meant because I was going to church out of obligation because I've always grown up in the church and my mom was always very big on going to church.
Reese Brown (51:50.56)
Pretty good.
Reese Brown (51:57.654)
you
Trinity H Stukey (52:09.986)
But then it got to the point where I was walking in the church and walking out and I didn't feel any different. And I was like, this has got to be the biggest sin I could ever be committing. I'm walking in God's house, sitting through an entire sermon and I'm walking outside and nothing's changed about me. Nothing's being pricked about me. Nothing's happening. I don't feel anything. And then COVID hit. And that was when I feel like the biggest piece of my life changed.
Reese Brown (52:14.442)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (52:37.9)
because I started having anxiety attacks and I had never had anxiety attacks before. But when you grow up in the faith, you are constantly reminded that like judgment is coming, Jesus is coming, it's almost here, the apocalypse is happening, Jesus is coming, the end of times is near. And that is so frightening for a kid. It's frightening. So when COVID happened, I was like, my God, this is it. This is it, like this is judgment day.
Reese Brown (52:41.066)
Hmm.
Reese Brown (52:59.266)
It is, it is.
Trinity H Stukey (53:07.81)
We're about to go see Jesus. We're going to have to stand in line. my God, I'm about to see God. And I started having anxiety attacks. And I remember laying in bed one night crying. And I asked myself the question, because I have no problem talking to myself and I have no problem with self -reflection. I practice self -reflection as often as I can because I like talking to myself. So what else am I going to talk to myself about but me?
And I remember laying in bed and having this thought and crying saying, if right now, judgment day was happening and my soul got sucked out my body and I had to go see God, am I going to heaven? Am I actually going? And because I couldn't answer that question with a yes, I was like, something's gotta change. Something has to change. So I quit going to church fully.
COVID also helped with that because you couldn't go to church at that time, but I stopped going to church and I made a vow of not going back into a physical building until I got a personal relationship with God. Because a lot of times people in the faith have a misconception that your relationship with God is bound to the church. is not. Church is a place of gathering. Your relationship with God is between you and him. And if you can't have a personal relationship with God yourself, you're not going to get it in church. You could, you could have an encounter
Reese Brown (54:14.933)
Hmm.
Reese Brown (54:31.829)
Mm -mm.
Trinity H Stukey (54:34.338)
But going in the church and going through the motions and then leaving, and now you have nobody to hold you accountable. There are no pews. There's nobody playing music. There's nobody preaching. You've got to have this will for God for yourself. And if you don't have that, you don't have a relationship with God. And so then what's the point of you going to church? Because really, you're just, it's a masquerade in there. You're putting on a face.
Reese Brown (54:54.645)
Yeah.
Right. Church is a communion. What are you communing with?
Trinity H Stukey (55:00.064)
It's a communion. And who are you communing for? Are you communing to go be with your buddies? Are you communing so that you can look good? Are you communing because it's something you've already done? Are you communing because God been good to me this week and I gotta let everybody know it? And I didn't have that. So I was like, I'm not gonna go no more until me and God get it together. And I have a true relationship with God because I owe him that. I owe him that. He's always looked out for me in my life.
Reese Brown (55:24.991)
Mmm.
Trinity H Stukey (55:28.972)
And so I started going to church via the internet and I was watching Elevation Worship. I love Stephen Furtick. He's a hoot. I laugh him all the time, but it was what I needed at the time. And then I remember one summer he did a sabbatical. So this was the first I'd ever heard of this as well, that pastors in the summer go off with their families and they have guest speakers come in.
I didn't really grow up with that. I grew up with my pastors preaching year round. Like every now and then we'd have like a guest speaker, but it was very far fewer in between. So this was also something new for me. Cause was like, y 'all do that? That is so cool. And Pastor Darius Daniels came and he preached a sermon that has stuck with me for the last couple of years. And he said, where you sit determines what you see and what you see determines what you do. And because God sits in a different place than you,
He sees things that you can't see, which is why when you don't understand what God is doing in your life, that's because you're sitting at a different angle. It doesn't mean that he's not listening to you. It doesn't mean he's not working your life. You're sitting at a different angle than he is. And I've got this renewed sense of faith. I got this renewed sense of joy. I started listening to worship music because I wanted to not out of obligation, not because it was something I'd always done, but I can't wait to hear that song again. I can't wait to hear those words again. And
Reese Brown (56:49.288)
Hmm.
Trinity H Stukey (56:57.518)
I just, and that was me, literally from 2019 until...
What's it 2024? So 2022, 2019 to 2022, that's all I did. And then I got married to my husband and we lived in a town home for about a year and then we bought a house. So we got in our house. And I remember like, I can't wait to do this. I'm going to oil my house and pray over my house because that is something my mom always did growing up.
Reese Brown (57:28.95)
Hmm.
Trinity H Stukey (57:29.282)
So this is what it means to be a homeowner. Like I'm gonna pray, I'm gonna play music, I'm gonna oil my house down, I'm gonna cover it. Like so excited. And then I sat down and I was like, I think I'm ready to go back to church. And I sat down and I prayed and I said, God, I'm ready to go back, but I'm not going back unless you're there. And I don't mean that to me that God's not in the churches. That's not what I mean. I mean, I need you to be there waiting for me to get there.
Reese Brown (57:36.039)
I love it.
Reese Brown (57:42.55)
you
Trinity H Stukey (57:58.496)
I need to know that when I step in this specific church, this is the church you have for me because you're there. I'm not going for the pomp and circus. I'm not going to go back to the way things were. You and I have a real relationship now. I have a renewed faith right now. I need to continue to nurture that. And I want to, I want to do it the right way. So you lead me where I should go. I'm not going to pick a church. You lead me. And then I had a sweet friend text me.
Reese Brown (58:16.478)
Hmm.
Reese Brown (58:23.732)
Well, and yeah, not all churches are created equal. I think that is, yes. Right, right, but sorry, please continue.
Trinity H Stukey (58:29.868)
That's a conversation itself. No, you are right. Not all churches are created equal. And again, I've been a part of a lot of different services churches. I've been a part of a lot of different denominations. And I never really got it. I mean, and I never cared to ask my mom either, but I never really understood. mean, I understand.
now as an adult that the denominations means that there are different ways that they go about things, they're different structures. And you can really see that with the Baptist. Baptist is very old school, which I love. But it's all about worshiping God. So to me, it never made a difference what church I went to because I'm worshiping God, we're serving the same God. Your service might be a little longer than theirs, but that's okay, like it is what it is. And so I had a very sweet friend one day out of the blue, messaged me on Instagram, and we were talking about God.
And I was like, yeah, you know, I'm looking for a church to go to. My husband and I just bought a house. We're in Panama City. I don't really know this area that well. And I'm just kind of, you know, waiting on God, feeling a few things out. And she goes, well, what about this church? And I've been going here and it's very diverse and I love it. I feel like the spirit is moving. I really feel like you like it. You should give it a try. So the first service we went to was during Christmas time and I loved it. And so me and my husband sat down and he was like, okay.
not trying to be rude, but if you can't preach a Christmas service, you shouldn't be open. He was like, so what we're going to do is we're going to go a couple more times after Christmas to really see if this is where we want to be. Because of course the Christmas service is going to be great. It's Christmas. And I was like, that's so fair. That's fair. So we went a few more times and then we tried another church and
Reese Brown (01:00:00.128)
mean, fair enough.
Reese Brown (01:00:13.878)
Yeah. Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (01:00:23.0)
We tried that church for a couple of weeks and then we just kind of sat down and I was just like, I want to go back to North Star. I liked that church. They may not do all the big things this other church is doing, but I feel at peace there. I feel at home there. I feel okay. And he was like, yeah, I was kind of skeptical. He was like, I kind of want to go back too. And we've been there ever since. And I have grown so much there. My husband has grown so much there.
And it's made all the difference in the world. But I definitely went through a period of time with God where I grew up knowing Him, but I grew up knowing of Him. I didn't really know Him. And then when I got it in myself that I needed to change, because if I were to die today, am I going to heaven? No, I don't have a relationship with God. What are we going to talk about when we get there? What my mama's been teaching me? No.
I've got to have faith for myself. My mama said, there are no two for one tickets up to heaven. I can't go off of what she's taught me. I've got to learn for myself. So then isolating myself from the church and saying, okay, God, it's just you and me. What are we, what we got, what we're going to do and getting this renewed faith for myself and then making the decision. Okay, I'm going to go back, but you got to go with me. So take me where you are. Where's your spirit residing and then riding it out since then. So
Reese Brown (01:01:29.302)
That's right.
Reese Brown (01:01:46.922)
Yeah.
Trinity H Stukey (01:01:50.914)
That's my journey.
Reese Brown (01:01:52.702)
I think that that is so powerful and I love there are no two for one tickets to heaven. I think that is so awesome and it really is and I as someone who doesn't necessarily consider myself a Christian in the category of that but very much like is a spiritual person and
Trinity H Stukey (01:02:00.814)
It's gold!
Trinity H Stukey (01:02:16.206)
Alright.
Reese Brown (01:02:20.958)
all of the heart of it is so, I just see so much alignment through so many different things. But I do think that in any...
Trinity H Stukey (01:02:23.416)
Right.
Reese Brown (01:02:33.61)
faith journey that it is so necessary that we are asking ourselves these questions, right? And I think that that is such, that's the message of your testimony is, yeah, I knew of what this was, but it does not impact me. It does not impact my life and the people around me and the way that I'm until I'm asking the questions of myself.
Trinity H Stukey (01:02:41.454)
Yes.
Trinity H Stukey (01:03:01.345)
Absolutely.
Reese Brown (01:03:01.418)
There are so many things in this world that other people already have answers for. And it is a lot easier to take the answers that they give us and say, okay, that makes relatively good enough sense. Cool, I'll use it too. Especially when it's a trusted adult like a parent or a friend or a mentor. But where is that actually rooted? And I think...
Answers have to be grounded in the journey and the experience and I think that that is exactly what your story illustrates is that it is in this personal self -reflection, but also trust and faith and surrender that brings the truth back into the picture, right? And I just think that that is so beautiful and
Trinity H Stukey (01:03:46.424)
That's the way it is.
Reese Brown (01:03:54.492)
however that looks for different people. I hope that everyone is doing that same thing and asking these questions for themselves and whatever God looks like for anyone, I hope that they have that personal relationship because I think that is, that's gold. Thank you very much for sharing. Well as we approach the end of our time together, which has gone by so fast, I've just really enjoyed
Trinity H Stukey (01:04:06.965)
As for
Trinity H Stukey (01:04:11.171)
Yeah.
come on.
Trinity H Stukey (01:04:21.302)
I know.
Reese Brown (01:04:23.282)
chatting and listening and learning and hearing everything. I have two questions that I always like to end with. One, in light of everything we've talked about, we've gone over a bunch of different things, but of course we can't get into all of who you are in an hour and some change conversation.
Is there anything we missed that you were like, I would be remiss if I didn't touch on this? Anything that we need to talk about? Anything that you're like, I'd like to go back and clarify. I'd like to reemphasize anything at all. This is time for you to go and share whatever is on your heart.
Trinity H Stukey (01:05:02.446)
I'll say this. So even though I've grown up, you know, single parents, I've had to be a little mini adult, even though I feel like I came out the womb being a little mini adult, I've always had a little bit of a two. I've always been a bit of a grown woman. And I've gone through all these
I'm so changes and I've had all these personal heart breaks and trials and obstacles that I've had to overcome. I would not go back and change the thing. I would not go back and change a thing about the way my wife played out as a child. I would not go back and change the thing about growing up in a single parent household. I would not change things about the way I. Grown the things I've overcome.
I will not change it. I wouldn't change a thing about those three years that I was walking through the wilderness for 40 days and 40 nights crying, praying for the same thing. Because you get to a point in your life where you have to look at your current and go.
I couldn't be more grateful for where I've ended up. And it's because of everything I've been through. It's because of who I am. It's because of the cards that life dealt me that I've been able to come out with a new hand. And I'm grateful. I'm grateful for it all. I'm grateful for always having a job. I'm grateful for not growing up with money in the bank 24 seven. I'm grateful for being an older sibling. I'm grateful for being my mom's right -hand man. I am grateful for
Reese Brown (01:06:13.236)
Hmm.
Trinity H Stukey (01:06:42.791)
School. I'm grateful for being the other kid. I'm grateful for not always fitting in. I'm grateful for going through trials and tribulations and having to have that self growth. Learning to love myself again, learning to love my life again, learning to appreciate who I am again. I'm grateful for the friends it brought me. I'm grateful for the husband it brought me because I could have ended up with someone else and I ended up with.
the greatest thing in the world. I love my husband and he had, because of my marriage to him, I have grown so much. And if I hadn't been with him, I wouldn't be where I am now because he had aided in a lot of my self growth and the safety and comfort and stability that this marriage to him, not just my marriage, my marriage to him has provided me, has allowed me to honestly face some things about me that maybe I wouldn't have had the opportunity to face had I been with someone else.
So I am grateful for every card I've been dealt because I walked out of it with a better hand. So that's all I have to say.
Reese Brown (01:07:48.214)
Bye.
don't want to say anything more because I feel like that is just, it stands for itself. The reason why I was looking down there for a minute is because I wanted to write down, it's because of the cards that life dealt me that I've been able to come out with a better hand. And I think that is remarkable. I love it so much. I'll also throw out there for anyone who is curious about Trinity's work, working with her one -on -one,
Trinity H Stukey (01:08:09.134)
Thank you so much.
Reese Brown (01:08:20.944)
or through life coaching, social media, consulting, all of the wonderful things that her company Butterfly and Bee does. Information and access to all of that will be in the description down below wherever you are listening or watching. So definitely please check out Trinity's work, give her a follow across social media, and go support her on all of the places. Last question.
just to hopefully put a little bow on everything is what is one word to describe how you're feeling right now.
Trinity H Stukey (01:08:48.032)
Okay.
Trinity H Stukey (01:08:58.958)
okay. One word to describe how I feel right now. Alive. I feel alive.
Reese Brown (01:09:08.182)
you
Reese Brown (01:09:12.0)
Me too.
I love it. Trinity, I cannot thank you enough for being here, so vulnerably sharing your heart and your energy and your story. I have personally loved getting to chat with you and I'm so excited to be able to share this conversation.
Trinity H Stukey (01:09:31.886)
Thank you so much. Thank you for having me. Thank you for letting me bear my heart. And thank you so much for your platform and what you do for people and your community as well. Thank you for your heart and bearing your heart with us as well.
Reese Brown (01:09:47.456)
Thank you, Charlie.
Trinity H Stukey (01:09:48.908)
You're welcome.